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The Forum Jokes Thread


Colin_McLeod
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Sexist, racist or religious jokes aren't funny - keep them to yourself!

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9 hours ago, KeithMacdonald said:

 

How many UK Government officials does it take to change a lightbulb?

 

 

The premise of this joke is flawed. There is no budget for replacement lighbulbs.

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10 hours ago, Welchester said:

How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?
 

Banana. 

 

You forgot the small off-duty Czechoslovakian traffic warden.

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14 hours ago, Hroth said:

 

You forgot

One to write the press release

and

One to proofread it to ensure that it follows all relevant inclusivity guidelines.

And 

A management trainee on a graduate fasttrack scheme, to make the tea.

 

So thats Thirteen....

 

 

 

For changing lightbulbs in the hallways of ex council properties now partially privately owned add another to prepare and send out a bill for £40 to each of the flat owners.

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8 hours ago, Deeps said:

Surely the question is, what is a lightbulb?

It's a thing you plant in the garden that isn't heavy.

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Posted (edited)
9 minutes ago, PhilJ W said:

So I'm not the only collector of cardboard boxes.

Mine do have stuff in them, even model train-related:

IMG_2496.JPG.87c20d8aec924ace37c82ed047a31a2a.JPG

Oddly, that white box (lower left) miraculously made it into the train room!!

 

 

And even prototype train-related junque stuff:

IMG_2518.JPG.a2471ce3541036fbc3b015a5a447fa48.JPG

that "W" is a Pennsy whistle post.

 

 

Edited by J. S. Bach
To add some information
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On 28/08/2024 at 22:27, KeithMacdonald said:

 

How many UK Government officials does it take to change a lightbulb?

 

Ten

One to change the bulb,

One to complete the Due Diligence Assessment

One to check that the new light bulb is an energy-efficient LED made in China

One to remove the old toxic light bulb to a municipal recycling centre in a government approved disposal box

Two to hold the ladder because Health & Safety

One to verify that the purchase of the light bulb complied with competitive tendering rules

Two to verifiy that the process complies with DEI directives

One to take pictures for the press release


As someone with experience of the Civil Service, that is far too close to the truth to be funny!

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10 hours ago, ColinK said:


I’ve got my late father’s study to sort out - which is very much like that.

 

 

Studies?

Don' talk about my study.....

 

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