exmoordave Posted July 4 Share Posted July 4 Every motning I take my cow on a walk through the local vineyard. Yes, that's right, I herd it through the grapevine............. 2 8 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted July 4 RMweb Premium Share Posted July 4 1 15 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Popular Post JZ Posted July 5 RMweb Premium Popular Post Share Posted July 5 1 23 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Hroth Posted July 5 RMweb Gold Share Posted July 5 5 minutes ago, JZ said: Couldn't have happened to a nicer bloke! 🤣 14 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
CameronL Posted July 5 Share Posted July 5 I wanted to build a model of a light railway based on the practices of Colonel Stephens. But I ran into a subordinate of his... Major Snagges. 6 7 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium JZ Posted July 5 RMweb Premium Share Posted July 5 9 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Thorness Posted July 5 Popular Post Share Posted July 5 3 1 17 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted July 5 RMweb Premium Share Posted July 5 4 hours ago, JZ said: 4 hours ago, Hroth said: Couldn't have happened to a nicer bloke! 🤣 I discovered when researching my family tree that he's a distant cousin of mine. 1 12 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Nick C Posted July 5 RMweb Gold Share Posted July 5 (edited) 2 hours ago, JZ said: Candidates are allowed to vote for themselves... (Ms Wall actually got 1833 votes) Edited July 5 by Nick C 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Popular Post JZ Posted July 6 RMweb Premium Popular Post Share Posted July 6 5 3 21 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold franciswilliamwebb Posted July 6 RMweb Gold Share Posted July 6 10 hours ago, PhilJ W said: I discovered when researching my family tree that he's a distant cousin of mine. Having Victorians in your family tree is actually extremely common😉 3 11 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
LNERW1 Posted July 6 Share Posted July 6 On 15/11/2009 at 20:25, rmnik said: What's the difference between a duck One of his legs is both the same My beloved Grandad used to tell a joke something like that. He was an enthusiast all his life, as was his brother. On perhaps a lighter note, what do you call a dictionary on drugs? High Definition. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, I’ll be here all night. 3 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Hroth Posted July 6 RMweb Gold Share Posted July 6 25 minutes ago, LNERW1 said: On perhaps a lighter note, what do you call a dictionary on drugs? The British National Formulary https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/British_National_Formulary 4 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium J. S. Bach Posted July 6 RMweb Premium Share Posted July 6 3 hours ago, LNERW1 said: On perhaps a lighter note, what do you call a dictionary on drugs? Addictionary? 3 2 7 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckymucklebackit Posted July 6 Share Posted July 6 8 hours ago, JZ said: Meh! Why despair at Scotland's expected dire performance when you can always laugh at your near neighbours over hyped failure? 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Saunders Posted July 6 Share Posted July 6 (edited) 28 minutes ago, luckymucklebackit said: Meh! Why despair at Scotland's expected dire performance when you can always laugh at your near neighbours over hyped failure? What's the difference! Edited July 6 by Mark Saunders fat fingers 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
markwilly Posted July 6 Share Posted July 6 Thanks for the explanation! It's great to see so many people contributing to the humor. Speaking of jokes, here’s a cheesy one for everyone: Why did the cheese get promoted? Because it was sharp and always on a roll! Looking forward to more laughs and cheesy puns! For more puns, check out this trusted website: https://allfunnypuns.com. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Hroth Posted July 6 RMweb Gold Share Posted July 6 1 hour ago, luckymucklebackit said: Meh! Why despair at Scotland's expected dire performance when you can always laugh at your near neighbours over hyped failure? I'll be glad when its all over. Hoping that the Swiss Rolls pull their fingers out! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post westernfan Posted July 6 Popular Post Share Posted July 6 A man wakes up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot. The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a pile-up on the motorway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything but I'm trying to break this to you gently, the fact is, your willy was chopped off in the wreck and we were unable to find it." The man groans, but the doctor goes on, "You've got £9,000 in insurance compensation coming and we have the technology now to build you a new willy that will work as well as your old one did - better in fact! But the thing is, it doesn't come cheap. It's £1,000 an inch." The man perks up at this. "So," the doctor says, "It's for you to decide how many inches you want. But it's something you'd better discuss with your wife. I mean, if you had a five inch one before, and you decide to go for a nine incher, she might be a bit put out. But if you had a nine inch one before, and you decide only to invest in a five incher this time, she might be disappointed. So it's important that she plays a role in helping you make the decision." The man agrees to talk with his wife. The doctor comes back the next day. "So," says the doctor, "have you spoken with your wife?" "I have," says the man. "And what is the decision?" asks the doctor. "We're having granite worktops" 1 1 20 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
exmoordave Posted July 7 Share Posted July 7 What's brown and sounds like a bell??????????????? DUNG................!!!!!!! 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium J. S. Bach Posted July 7 RMweb Premium Share Posted July 7 GROAN! 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium JZ Posted July 7 RMweb Premium Share Posted July 7 1 1 15 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted July 7 RMweb Premium Share Posted July 7 1 14 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Obi-Jiff Kenobi Posted July 8 Share Posted July 8 No young woman from Venus? 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeithMacdonald Posted July 8 Share Posted July 8 Or a ship's cook named Carter? 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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