RMweb Gold Vistisen Posted February 6, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 6, 2023 4 hours ago, KeithMacdonald said: Maybe it's a kind of Darwin Award, for the squirrel that tried stashing its nuts in the most stupid place. Where as these squirrels are probably more intelligent than me 4 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold chris p bacon Posted February 6, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 6, 2023 If a grey squirrel is caught in the UK it cannot be released and has to be destroyed. 4 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold The Johnster Posted February 6, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 6, 2023 (edited) Millions of them in urban parks die horribly of cancer after becoming addicted to cigarrette butts, which could be construed both as humanity's fault and tree-rat stupidity... Edited February 6, 2023 by The Johnster 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
2750Papyrus Posted February 6, 2023 Share Posted February 6, 2023 (edited) When I was young, I was told a bounty of 2/6 was payable for each squirrel tail submitted. And the local squirrels (Highgate Woods) were red. Edited February 6, 2023 by 2750Papyrus spelling error 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium newbryford Posted February 6, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted February 6, 2023 Don't search youtube for "squirrel launcher".......... 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Popular Post Dagworth Posted February 6, 2023 RMweb Gold Popular Post Share Posted February 6, 2023 22 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium J. S. Bach Posted February 6, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted February 6, 2023 Two elderly Gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: 'Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?' Slim says, 'I feel just like a newborn baby.' 'Really!? Like a newborn baby!?' 'Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants. 1 14 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Hroth Posted February 7, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 7, 2023 7 hours ago, Dagworth said: I see that bigger vehicles have attempted to "deliver" that bridge too... 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium kevinlms Posted February 7, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted February 7, 2023 6 hours ago, Hroth said: I see that bigger vehicles have attempted to "deliver" that bridge too... One of them will be successful, if enough keep trying! 4 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
CameronL Posted February 7, 2023 Share Posted February 7, 2023 10 hours ago, J. S. Bach said: Two elderly Gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: 'Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?' Slim says, 'I feel just like a newborn baby.' 'Really!? Like a newborn baby!?' 'Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants. Two hard-of-hearing elderly Gentlemen were sitting on a bench and one said to the other : "It's windy today." "No, it's not," his friend replied. "It's Thursday." "So am I," the first one said. "Let's go for a drink." 1 11 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Popular Post Al51 Posted February 7, 2023 RMweb Premium Popular Post Share Posted February 7, 2023 I was scraping the ice off of my car windscreen this morning and one of the neighbours was out as well, I think he must be new because I've not met him before, pale, thin fella, in a hoodie, but long, kind of like a cloak and his scraper was really weird, it had a long wooden handle and this fantastic curved blade that came out at a right angle from the top, bit like a scythe. Now I stop to think about it... I may have been de-icing with Death 1 27 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted February 7, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted February 7, 2023 Where is that GROAN! button? 5 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold BoD Posted February 8, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 8, 2023 On 07/02/2023 at 10:27, Al51 said: I was scraping the ice off of my car windscreen this morning and one of the neighbours was out as well, I think he must be new because I've not met him before, pale, thin fella, in a hoodie, but long, kind of like a cloak and his scraper was really weird, it had a long wooden handle and this fantastic curved blade that came out at a right angle from the top, bit like a scythe. Now I stop to think about it... I may have been de-icing with Death Just as well you weren't hoovering then - you might have been Dyson with death. 11 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeithMacdonald Posted February 8, 2023 Share Posted February 8, 2023 On 06/02/2023 at 23:44, J. S. Bach said: Two elderly Gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: It's nice out today. The other one says: Is this the start of a Morecombe and Wise joke? 1 1 5 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Tim123 Posted February 8, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 8, 2023 16 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeithMacdonald Posted February 8, 2023 Share Posted February 8, 2023 2 2 9 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Hroth Posted February 9, 2023 RMweb Gold Share Posted February 9, 2023 10 hours ago, KeithMacdonald said: It's nice out today. The other one says: Is this the start of a Morecombe and Wise joke? Its even older than that... 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
CameronL Posted February 10, 2023 Share Posted February 10, 2023 A Scottish Joke … There wiz a mon walkin’ through a coo field. Noo, there wiz a wee burn flowin’ through the field, and he sees anither mon bendin’ doon an’ swallyin’ the watter wi’ one hond. So he sez tae him “’Scuse me, pal. See thon watter. Dinnae swally thon watter. It’s fu’ o’ coo poo.” Well, the mon stonds up and sez tae him: “I’m sorry. I didn’t understand a word of that. Could you possibly speak English?” And the mon sez: “Swally with baith yur honds. Ye’ll get mair doon ye that way.” And the translation … There was a man walking through a cow field. There was a small stream flowing through the field, and he saw another man bending down and drinking the water with one hand. So he said to the man: “Excuse me, friend. Don’t drink the water. It’s full of cow excrement.” The man stood up and said to him: “I’m sorry. I didn’t understand a word of that. Could you possibly speak English?” And the man said “Drink with both hands. You’ll get more down you that way." 1 9 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Bernard Lamb Posted February 10, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted February 10, 2023 1 17 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post luckymucklebackit Posted February 13, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted February 13, 2023 My mate has quit his job at BMW. Naturally he gave no indication he was leaving. 3 1 28 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Popular Post Colin_McLeod Posted February 13, 2023 Author RMweb Gold Popular Post Share Posted February 13, 2023 1 18 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post F-UnitMad Posted February 13, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted February 13, 2023 2 12 8 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted February 14, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted February 14, 2023 1 13 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium PhilJ W Posted February 14, 2023 RMweb Premium Share Posted February 14, 2023 Unidentified flying object spotted over Ukraine. 1 4 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
NIK Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 After the Brits awards Sam Smith over inflated his balloon suit and was shot down over North America. 5 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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