Popular Post APOLLO Posted April 3, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted April 3, 2021 Brit15 2 22 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steamport Southport Posted April 3, 2021 Share Posted April 3, 2021 7 hours ago, Steamport Southport said: Scotland has it's own bunch of political nutters. They don't need to import them from America.... And speaking of which it seems that George Galloway has reared his head again. For the benefit of our foreign cousins this was the politician who pretended he was a cat on prime time TV.... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Hroth Posted April 3, 2021 RMweb Gold Share Posted April 3, 2021 Drat, we aren't allowed "religious" jokes, so I can't remark on one of Man Citys goal-scorers playing today... Oh well, Why did the chicken cross the road? (I'll think of a punchline sooner or later...) Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Administrators AY Mod Posted April 3, 2021 Administrators Share Posted April 3, 2021 30 minutes ago, PenrithBeacon said: Image removed. What bit of the big red banner at the top of the page don't you get? That gag has been offensive every year on here. Wise up. 2 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold TheSignalEngineer Posted April 4, 2021 RMweb Gold Share Posted April 4, 2021 13 hours ago, Hroth said: Drat, we aren't allowed "religious" jokes, so I can't remark on one of Man Citys goal-scorers playing today... Pity, he was mentioned in an old joke concerning a famous Liverpool forward. 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Sidecar Racer Posted April 4, 2021 RMweb Premium Share Posted April 4, 2021 It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach. One human hair can support 6.6 pounds. The average man's p**** is two times the length of his thumb. Human thighbones are stronger than concrete. A woman's heart beats faster than a man's. There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet. Women blink twice as often as men. The average person's skin weighs twice as much as the brain. Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still. If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it. Women will be finished reading this by now. Men... are still busy checking their thumbs. 1 1 1 13 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Obi-Jiff Kenobi Posted April 4, 2021 Share Posted April 4, 2021 Spring has sprung, The grass is ris, I wonder where The birdies is. 5 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steamport Southport Posted April 4, 2021 Share Posted April 4, 2021 1 8 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Hroth Posted April 4, 2021 RMweb Gold Share Posted April 4, 2021 26 minutes ago, Obi-Jiff Kenobi said: Spring has sprung, The grass is ris, I wonder where The birdies is. Poor things The birdies on the wing But thats absurd The wingies on the bird! 2 1 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Titan Posted April 4, 2021 Share Posted April 4, 2021 16 hours ago, Hroth said: Drat, we aren't allowed "religious" jokes, so I can't remark on one of Man Citys goal-scorers playing today... Oh well, Why did the chicken cross the road? (I'll think of a punchline sooner or later...) I want to live in a world where a chicken can cross the road without having it's motives questioned! 3 4 6 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruffnut Thorston Posted April 4, 2021 Share Posted April 4, 2021 (edited) The chicken wonders why there are Zebra Crossings, Pelican Crossings, Toucan Crossings..... But, no Chicken Crossings! Edited April 4, 2021 by Ruffnut Thorston Images added... 3 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Hroth Posted April 4, 2021 RMweb Gold Share Posted April 4, 2021 8 minutes ago, Ruffnut Thorston said: The chicken wonders why there are Zebra Crossings, Pelican Crossings, Toucan Crossings..... But, no Chicken Crossings! Because the fast-food trade need chicken nuggets! As for the rest, a Zebra is a barcoded horse, and a wonderful bird is the pelican, his beak can hold more than his belly can! We won't enquire into the Toucans activities, he was last seen staggering home with two cans of Guinness.... The first Guinness toucan advertisement from 1935. Guinness Archives, Diageo Ireland 6 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Compound2632 Posted April 4, 2021 RMweb Premium Share Posted April 4, 2021 8 minutes ago, Hroth said: We won't enquire into the Toucans activities, I understood they are so named from their bimodal nature (the crossings, that is, not the birds) - pedestrians and cyclists crossing. 1 2 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
33C Posted April 4, 2021 Share Posted April 4, 2021 4 hours ago, Hroth said: Because the fast-food trade need chicken nuggets! As for the rest, a Zebra is a barcoded horse, and a wonderful bird is the pelican, his beak can hold more than his belly can! We won't enquire into the Toucans activities, he was last seen staggering home with two cans of Guinness.... The first Guinness toucan advertisement from 1935. Guinness Archives, Diageo Ireland What does a Toucan and the Gas Board have in common? They can both shove their bills up their a**e. 2 1 4 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Compound2632 Posted April 4, 2021 RMweb Premium Share Posted April 4, 2021 15 minutes ago, 33C said: the Gas Board That dates that one! 3 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Hroth Posted April 4, 2021 RMweb Gold Share Posted April 4, 2021 39 minutes ago, 33C said: What does a Toucan and the Gas Board have in common? They can both shove their bills up their a**e. 24 minutes ago, Compound2632 said: That dates that one! Good old Mr Therm.... 3 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold The Johnster Posted April 4, 2021 RMweb Gold Share Posted April 4, 2021 12 hours ago, Obi-Jiff Kenobi said: Spring has sprung, The grass is ris, I wonder where The birdies is. Them little birds is on the wing but that's absurd! I always thought the wing was on the little bird. Best orated in a Brooklyn accent; boidies, absoid... 2 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold The Johnster Posted April 4, 2021 RMweb Gold Share Posted April 4, 2021 7 hours ago, Hroth said: a wonderful bird is the pelican, his beak can hold more than his belly can! We really don't know 'ow the 'ell 'e can, but a wonderful bird is the pelican. 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Markwj Posted April 5, 2021 RMweb Gold Share Posted April 5, 2021 Yes I know the photo has been on before (not the caption made me laugh anyway). 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Gold Hroth Posted April 5, 2021 RMweb Gold Share Posted April 5, 2021 1 hour ago, Markwj said: Yes I know the photo has been on before (not the caption made me laugh anyway). It doesn't matter how big the boat is, a pair of numpties will always try to turn it in too narrow a spot. And I'd bet there's a winding hole just around the bend... 1 2 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baby Deltic Posted April 5, 2021 Share Posted April 5, 2021 1 8 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baby Deltic Posted April 5, 2021 Share Posted April 5, 2021 2 5 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Baby Deltic Posted April 5, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted April 5, 2021 3 21 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baby Deltic Posted April 5, 2021 Share Posted April 5, 2021 4 1 11 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baby Deltic Posted April 5, 2021 Share Posted April 5, 2021 1 14 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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