Ozexpatriate Posted September 8, 2017 Share Posted September 8, 2017 (edited) Apologies if this one has been up before, but I thought this cycling related one I found on the web was also appropriate to us. Whacky [sic] Signs, and less than two weeks ago. (Same illustration too - cropped a bit.) Edited September 8, 2017 by Ozexpatriate Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
manna Posted September 8, 2017 Share Posted September 8, 2017 G'Day Gents For when your having a mowing competition ? manna 6 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Tim Dubya Posted September 9, 2017 RMweb Premium Share Posted September 9, 2017 13 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Ian J. Posted September 9, 2017 RMweb Premium Share Posted September 9, 2017 Dogs Are Welcome.jpg Unfortunately, dogs tend not to pay the bill... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
BG John Posted September 9, 2017 Share Posted September 9, 2017 Unfortunately, dogs tend not to pay the bill... Shows how clever they were not to evolve pockets. They always take someone with them to deal with mundane stuff like that . 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
steve1 Posted September 9, 2017 Share Posted September 9, 2017 Yes, when the going gets wuff, the wuff get going! (Without paying the bill.) steve Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
manna Posted September 9, 2017 Share Posted September 9, 2017 G'Day Gents Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluebottle Posted September 9, 2017 Share Posted September 9, 2017 G'Day Gents Attached thumbnails And detached toenails - Ouch!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
shortliner Posted September 10, 2017 Share Posted September 10, 2017 For all those grandparents that inhabit this area - how grandchildren perceive you! 1. I was in the bathroom, putting on my make-up, under the watchful eyes of my young granddaughter, as I'd done many times before. After I applied my lipstick and started to leave, the little one said, "But Grandma, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!” I will probably never put lipstick on again without thinking about kissing the toilet paper good-bye.... 2. My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I was, and I told him, 72. My grandson was quiet for a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?" 3. After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?" 4. A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like. "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods.” The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!" 5. My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo and I said, "No, how are we alike?’' "You're both old," he replied. 6. A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read." 7. I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colours yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what colour it was. She would tell me and was always correct. It was fun for me, so I continued. At last, she headed for the door, saying, "Grandma, I really think you should try to figure out some of these colours yourself!" 8. When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies followed us in.Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered, "It's no use Grandpa. Now the mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights." 9. When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not sure.” "Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he advised. "Mine says I'm 4 to 6." (WOW! I really like this one -- it says I'm only '38'!) 10. A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, "Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today.” The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting." she said. "How do you make babies?” "It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'." 11. Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a teacher. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant.” The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked. "Sure," said the young boy confidently. "It means carrying a child." 12. A grandfather was delivering his grandchildren to their home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties. "They use him to keep crowds back," said one child. "No," said another. "He's just for good luck.” A third child brought the argument to a close. “They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrent." 13. A 6-year-old was asked where his grandma lived? "Oh," he said, "she lives at the airport, and whenever we want her, we just go get her. Then, when we're done having her visit, we take her back to the airport." 14. Grandpa is the smartest man on earth! He teaches me good things, but I don't get to see him enough to get as smart as him! 15. My Grandparents are funny, when they bend over, you hear gas leaks and they blame their dog. 4 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
kernowtim Posted September 10, 2017 Share Posted September 10, 2017 And? Everything is £1, apart from the items that are £2 ;-) Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Sidecar Racer Posted September 10, 2017 RMweb Premium Share Posted September 10, 2017 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
manna Posted September 11, 2017 Share Posted September 11, 2017 G'Day Gents 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium jbqfc Posted September 11, 2017 RMweb Premium Share Posted September 11, 2017 (edited) Edited September 11, 2017 by jbqfc Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Sidecar Racer Posted September 11, 2017 RMweb Premium Share Posted September 11, 2017 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
manna Posted September 11, 2017 Share Posted September 11, 2017 G'Day Gents 5 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
eastwestdivide Posted September 12, 2017 Share Posted September 12, 2017 Is this what they call fusion food? I'll have an Anglo-Saxon Italian Halal Southern Fried Chicken please. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horsetan Posted September 12, 2017 Share Posted September 12, 2017 ....I'll have an Anglo-Saxon Italian Halal Southern Fried Chicken please. Given that a fair amount of the foodstuffs you buy in the supermarkets is already halal-approved, whether we want it or not, I'd say the Halal Southern Fried Chicken is perfectly possible these days! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Titan Posted September 12, 2017 Share Posted September 12, 2017 What next, Halal pork? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horsetan Posted September 12, 2017 Share Posted September 12, 2017 What next, Halal pork? That has actually happened before, albeit "accidentally". You know those huge conical rotating kebab meat stacks you see revolving in your average kebab shop? Well, apparently a while ago, food hygiene inspectors took samples from a few kebab outlets - all were "halal-approved". Analysis of these meat samples revealed the definite presence of.....pork! This sort of confirms to you that adhering to religious strictures isn't always uppermost in the minds of your average kebab shop operators, who don't necessarily care where the meat originates from so long as they can cook it, serve it, and make a living out of your average Joe Late-Night Punter. Also the method of transportation can sometimes be a bit suspect.... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium Sidecar Racer Posted September 12, 2017 RMweb Premium Share Posted September 12, 2017 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
manna Posted September 12, 2017 Share Posted September 12, 2017 (edited) G'Day Gents Edited September 12, 2017 by manna 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RMweb Premium kevinlms Posted September 12, 2017 RMweb Premium Share Posted September 12, 2017 Given that a fair amount of the foodstuffs you buy in the supermarkets is already halal-approved, whether we want it or not, I'd say the Halal Southern Fried Chicken is perfectly possible these days! Ah yes, Pauline Hanson's favourite topic! 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
great central Posted September 13, 2017 Share Posted September 13, 2017 Given that a fair amount of the foodstuffs you buy in the supermarkets is already halal-approved, whether we want it or not, I'd say the Halal Southern Fried Chicken is perfectly possible these days! There are certainly a number of the Subway outlets that are halal approved, I seem to remember reading somewhere that some KFC are too. Without wishing to stray into forbidden territory all I'll say is I won't knowingly use them, not that I frequent either very often. 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckymucklebackit Posted September 13, 2017 Share Posted September 13, 2017 slap face.jpg I don't get it? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeremyC Posted September 13, 2017 Share Posted September 13, 2017 (edited) I don't get it? Use of your / you're in correct context :-) Edited September 13, 2017 by JeremyC Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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