How to get lynched at a model railway show

[PhilJ W]

At a certain specialist finescale show, oh, about nine months ago:

 

A leading pre-group 'expert'   - "Your Maryport & Carlisle engines, are they scratchbuilt ?"

Me  - "Ermm, yes" (resisting the temptation to say that they fell from the sky or were a very limited Bachmann issue)

'Expert' - "of course, you'll know that the M&CR lined it's engines  don't you ?" (ignoring lined tenders and boiler bands)

Me - "I know, I just haven't finished them yet"

'Expert' - "and ALL M&CR engines had numberplates but you've missed them off this one" (pointing to a model of M&CR No26)

Me - " Well., No. 26 was the only one that didn't"

'Expert' - "Oh, I think you're wro...(big clear photo of said engine sans number plates silently pushed under nose of said expert)...anyway, what did you varnish them with ?"

Me - "Johnson's Klear"

'Expert' - " Oh, you made a big mistake there, you should never ever use Klear on models, oh dear me, no" (that's me and several thousand aircraft modellers told, then)

Me - "I'll bear that in mind. Did you bring any of your M****** Railway models for us to see ?" (at which point said expert starts talking to one of his mates and ignores my obviously feeble attempt at fine-scale pre-group modelling)

I would have asked him to show some of his own models to demonstrate what he means.

'Expert' was dying to be lynched - why wasn't he?

 

M****** - Midland?

They couldn't find the rope?

[terry.ecmr]

At a recent show two punters were studying my 'Earl's Court' layout. One then said, in a voice loud enough to make sure I heard, "it didn't look like that"

So I bit.

me: "what didn't?"

him: "Earl's Court......it didn't look like that."

me: "No, the station is fictitious. It says in the program. And there is a map and a description explaining that on the layout" (in front of the fiddle yard).

him: "Fictitious?"

me: "Yes"

 

He then paused for a moment before replying..."yeh, but it didn't look like that!"

 

I just walked away to re-rail something that didn't need re-railing. Even his mate looked embarrassed!

 

Terry

ecmr.webs.com

[Griffin Road]

At a recent show two punters were studying my 'Earl's Court' layout. One then said, in a voice loud enough to make sure I heard, "it didn't look like that"

So I bit.

me: "what didn't?"

him: "Earl's Court......it didn't look like that."

me: "No, the station is fictitious. It says in the program. And there is a map and a description explaining that on the layout" (in front of the fiddle yard).

him: "Fictitious?"

me: "Yes"

 

He then paused for a moment before replying..."yeh, but it didn't look like that!"

 

I just walked away to re-rail something that didn't need re-railing. Even his mate looked embarrassed!

 

Terry

ecmr.webs.com

 

I had something similar happier with my layout ' New Garnock ' at Ayr show last year .

 

The only thing is I had at least a 30 minute debate over it and it's authenticity , location etc . The guy just couldn't understand the concept of made up .

 

My parting words to him were - " wait till you see my other layout - Hunterston " . His brain then rebooted and I thought I was going to have to hit ' control alt delete ' !

 

Mike b

[Colin_McLeod]

"Fictitious

 

me: "No, the station is fictitious. It says in the program.

him: "Fictitious?"

me: "Yes"

 

He then paused for a moment before replying..."yeh, but it didn't look like that!"

 

Would that be "Fictitious Central" or "Fictitious West"?  One of them did look at bit like Earls Court! LOL 

[Griffin Road]

To clarify my post above -

 

New Garnock was built as a 4 mm scale model of an existing 7 mm model our club ( Ayr ) had . It was based on the line from lugton to beith . I assumed the village had been made into one of Scotland's new towns in the late 50s early 60s . The station had be rationalised and truncated .

 

The guy just couldn't accept the concept and the fact that it was a model of a model of a fictitious place ...... He lived in the area and was sure it was all wrong .

 

Is this hard to understand or was it just him ?

 

M b

[Horsetan]

At a recent show two punters were studying my 'Earl's Court' layout. One then said, in a voice loud enough to make sure I heard, "it didn't look like that"

So I bit.

me: "what didn't?"

him: "Earl's Court......it didn't look like that."

me: "No, the station is fictitious. It says in the program. And there is a map and a description explaining that on the layout" (in front of the fiddle yard).

him: "Fictitious?"

me: "Yes"

 

He then paused for a moment before replying..."yeh, but it didn't look like that!"

 

I just walked away to re-rail something that didn't need re-railing. Even his mate looked embarrassed!

Reminds me of a "Little Britain" sketch....

[DLT]

I would have asked him to show some of his own models to demonstrate what he means.

They couldn't find the rope?

The found the rope, but it had the wrong number of strands in it...

[jamie92208]

One of my friends, a lifelong L & Y fan buit a layout set 'somewhere in a Yorkshire Mill Town' and decided to call it Ellanwhy.   At a show we were asked " Whereabouts in Wales is "Ethanwee" (spelt phonetically).   We could have tried to lynch them but would have struggled due to trying not to laugh too loudly.

 

Jamie

Edited June 17, 2014 by jamie92208

[Horsetan]

 

....They couldn't find the rope?

 

 

They found the rope, but it had the wrong number of strands in it...

 

Maybe it wasn't long enough to hang him.

[kevinlms]

Maybe it wasn't long enough to hang him.

Perhaps you mean, too long?

[DavidH]

I wonder if this difficulty for some people to comprehend that a model is of a fictitious place is related to autism/aspergers. I don't know much about ASD, but wonder if for a person somewhere on the autism spectrum, when presented with a "real" model, they can see the model is "real", so it must be "real" - but then they are told it is "not real", a made-up place ...

 

And to make things worse it uses a real name or one close to a real name. If your brain struggles to process the ideas, the links between real/not real, that most people have no problem with, then you end up looking daft. Perhaps.

[Horsetan]

I wonder if this difficulty for some people to comprehend that a model is of a fictitious place is related to autism/aspergers. I don't know much about ASD, but wonder if for a person somewhere on the autism spectrum, when presented with a "real" model, they can see the model is "real", so it must be "real" - but then they are told it is "not real", a made-up place ...

 

And to make things worse it uses a real name or one close to a real name. If your brain struggles to process the ideas, the links between real/not real, that most people have no problem with, then you end up looking daft. Perhaps.

"These cows are very small, but the ones out there are far away. Very small....far away.

 

Ah, forget it."

[Satan's Goldfish]

I wonder if this difficulty for some people to comprehend that a model is of a fictitious place is related to autism/aspergers. I don't know much about ASD, but wonder if for a person somewhere on the autism spectrum, when presented with a "real" model, they can see the model is "real", so it must be "real" - but then they are told it is "not real", a made-up place ...

 

And to make things worse it uses a real name or one close to a real name. If your brain struggles to process the ideas, the links between real/not real, that most people have no problem with, then you end up looking daft. Perhaps.

 

^ I don't need that issue to look daft ...... ^

[SM42]

I found that asking the exhibition manager (during the the exhibition of course) if "he was thinking about doing anything useful today" sometimes required a fleetness of foot that would make Usain Bolt jealous.

 

Andy

[Griffin Road]

I found that asking the exhibition manager (during the the exhibition of course) if "he was thinking about doing anything useful today" sometimes required a fleetness of foot that would make Usain Bolt jealous.

 

Andy

That is a fantastic idea - I will try it in Glasgow next year . Mr Porteus is usually at a loose end for four days after ditching all the operations side in my lap . I do keep him busy but he can stray on occasion .........

 

 

Mike b

[Horsetan]

Perhaps you mean, too long?

It was a very tall gallows.

[andyram]

A slight deviation.

 

"How to get lynched on RMWeb!"

 

Suggest that a particular show was a little expensive when compared to larger shows! Did this a couple of weeks ago....oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!

[Andy Reichert]

To clarify my post above -

 

New Garnock was built as a 4 mm scale model of an existing 7 mm model our club ( Ayr ) had . It was based on the line from lugton to beith . I assumed the village had been made into one of Scotland's new towns in the late 50s early 60s . The station had be rationalised and truncated .

 

The guy just couldn't accept the concept and the fact that it was a model of a model of a fictitious place ...... He lived in the area and was sure it was all wrong .

 

Is this hard to understand or was it just him ?

 

M b

 

Errrr. . . . . Just a mo'.

 

I think a model of a model is still technically a model.  But I'm not sure a model of a non-existent "thing" can be considered a model, since actually it's an original. . . . . . . . . . . . . .      See the OED.

 

Or am I being too picky. . . . .

[Griffin Road]

Errrr. . . . . Just a mo'.

 

I think a model of a model is still technically a model. But I'm not sure a model of a non-existent "thing" can be considered a model, since actually it's an original. . . . . . . . . . . . . . See the OED.

 

Or am I being too picky. . . . .

Jings ! Now I am as confused as the guy at the show was .....

 

My 4mm layout was exactly scaled down from the 7 mm version . A couple of us spent a night measuring and doing the maths . So it is a model of an original I suppose .

 

I wish I had thought of that at the time .

 

Just as well you were paying attention .

 

Mike b

[Brit70053]

Reminds me of a "Little Britain" sketch....

Naw! Its Monty Python - "You only paid for a five minute argument"

[Satan's Goldfish]

Naw! Its Monty Python - "You only paid for a five minute argument"

no I didn't....

[F-UnitMad]

A slight deviation. "How to get lynched on RMWeb!" Suggest that a particular show was a little expensive when compared to larger shows! Did this a couple of weeks ago....oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!

Oh, do tell....!!

[BR60103]

Errrr. . . . . Just a mo'.

 

I think a model of a model is still technically a model.  But I'm not sure a model of a non-existent "thing" can be considered a model, since actually it's an original. . . . . . . . . . . . . .      See the OED.

 

Or am I being too picky. . . . .

But isn't a model of a non-existent thing the prototype?

[sparks]

Ah yes, 'The Slate Railway to Churchwater' (Buddle Press)... (can't find my copy at the moment, think I've lent it to someone... )

 

Yes, Brian did produce that. It was mostly written in the mid-late 1970s, as a personal project, but it actually got published when he went to work for Merlin Loco Works in Llanfair for a while.

 

The thing about that book is that the subject matter was also invented by me! It was a fictitious narrow gauge slate line, feeding an equally fictitious GW branch line, in the very real county of Herefordshire. Most of the places existed but didn't have railways, although 'Churchwater' was indeed made up.

 

I was building the layout of the book, the interchange station between the narrow gauge and standard gauge got started, but various house and job moves saw the boards packed away for a few years. When they emerged, I scrapped the Herefordshire idea and the layout became 'Engine Wood'....

 

My much younger and impressionable self came across this book on Brian's stand somewhere (16mm Association show in Coventry?) and was amazed to learn that there was a narrow gauge railway that we knew nothing about! I eventually spotted the disclaimer on the last page and bought it anyway because it was so well done. I also have 'Tales of the Bedside Nurseries' too somewhere.

[298]

A slight deviation.

 

"How to get lynched on RMWeb!"

 

Suggest that a particular show was a little expensive when compared to larger shows! Did this a couple of weeks ago....oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!

What you should have said was, "Why does it cost more to go to a large show, when I can see at least twice as many that suit my interest at a specialist one for less money.....?"